Single Black Lee Male

I'm not too sure what to make of this Courtney Lee character. Last year, with the Magic, she seemed like a nice lady who was down to play some tough defense and maybe make a three-pointer or miss an alley-oop layup on occasion.


But this year, there is something different. For instance, now she plays with the New Jersey Nets. That's not the difference I was talking about, necessarily. Check this out.


I know what you're thinking. No, that isn't Kenyon Martin from 2000 to 2004. It's just a case of one human (Courtney Lee) trying to be another human (Kenyon Martin) who was trying to be another human (Method Man). A real Kirk Lazarus situation.


Feels like an identity crisis starring John Cusack and Ray Liotta. Last season, peeps were like, "check out Courtney Lee, he's pretty legit." And he was sorta legit. He was a down-to-earth tucked-in shirt bro with a lady's name.


Now he is all headbandy and goateed, and I'm kinda thinking maybe he wants to be an enforcer like Kenyon Martin. Or maybe he wants to shoot bad jumpshots like Kenyon Martin. It's possible he wants to reinvent himself as a good defender who thinks he's an elite defender like Kenyon Martin. Maybe he just likes holding backboards like Kenyon Martin.


That's all well and good. Maybe he'll be the number one draft pick some time. I don't know. But I do know that there is one thing that I just can't accept from Courtney Lee, and that is a comically bad tattoo of a rapper's lips on his neck.

Be careful, Courtney Lee.

What I Learned This Weekend

Have you guys heard of learning? It's cool. Basically, you see, hear, or otherwise experience different events and then you use those events to make yourself smarter and more knowledgeable. I did learning this weekend. I watched television shows and basketball games quite a bit. I also throughthrew a softball.

But more important was the learning that I did. Here are some THINGS THAT I LEARNED THIS WEEKEND:

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Denver Nuggets coach George Karl takes grooming advice from the ghost of former President Gerald Ford.

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THE REASON WHY JR Smith copies famous celebrations is because if he were left to his own devices, he reverts to acting like Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson from the motion picture EdTV.

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• Using bullet points is a good way of making important information stick out.
• So is bolding random words.

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IN THE OFF-SEASON, Dallas Mavericks forward Dirk Nowitzki is the captain of a crab fishing ship called the Northwestern. His exploits are documented by the television show Deadliest Catch.

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• RANDOMLY CAPITALIZING words is also effective for drawing attention to notable happenings. It is called HODGMANCASE.

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FOR HALLOWEEN, JR Smith and Kenyon Martin plan on going as Redman and Method Man. The twist is that while Redman is lighter than Method Man, Kenyon is lighter than JR. This is called irony or the "yin-yang effect."

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WHILE WRITING THIS POST, I learned that I know how to spell McConaughey correctly.

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