November 24, 2009

If My Dog Played Basketball

Everybody knows that my dog Yams really likes basketball.

As you can see she clearly 'nose for the ball' and she is pretty aggressive when going for it. I think that means that she'd be a really good rebounder, and would probably get a modest contract from the Houston Rockets because of efficiency. Which is cool since she'd be the first female to play in the NBA.

But sometimes, I wish she was a more skilled basketball player. I wish she could do other things besides just rebounding. I mean, yeah, it's worked out pretty well for Reggie Evans, but I want something better for Yams.

It would be excellent if I could teach her tons of ball-handling moves. Maybe I'd call her God Yammgod.

But I've always been a big guy, so I would have to teach her big guy things. Like how to block a lot of shots, but never really be a good defender. I would call her Yamuel Dalembert.

Maybe after that she would have one good year, get a huge contract, and then never fulfill that contract. I would call her Erick Yampier.

Later on we'd work on her 18-footer. It'd really help expand her limited offensive repertoire. Along with the rebounding and shot-blocking, she'd have three valuable skills. I would call her Marcus Yamby.

When her playing career has ended she'll probably have a reputation as a hard-worker who is committed to defense. Hopefully that means she'll be able to coach someday. If so, I'd call her Kurt Yambis.

This is all a dream though. She's only a year old, and even in dog years that's not old enough to enter the Draft. But depending on how you look at it, we have somewhere between 3 and 17 years to get her ready for the NBA. By then the gender/species barrier might have already been broken. But if not, I'm hoping Yams Baldwin Kerby can be the first to do it.


3rdStoneFromTheSun said...

dem dogs can ball

great stuff

glad you are on my blogroll

Josh Dhani said...

Lol nice job man! Did you photoshop that? Lol, good work!

Josh Dhani