June 29, 2009

Proposed Nicknames for All 60 Draftees

1. Blake “Gingerballs” Griffin
2. Hasheem “The Meme” Thabeet
3. James “Beardo” Harden
4. Tyreke “Jowls” Evans
5. Ricky “RubiBro” Rubio
6. “Jolly” Jonny Flynn
7. Stephen “Steve” Curry
8. Jordan “Dru” Hill
9. Demar “Dee Dee” DeRozan
10. Brandon “Ken” Jennings
11. Terrence “Scary Terry” Williams
12. Gerald “Male Pattern Baldness” Henderson
13. Tyler “Crunk Juice” Hansbrough
14. Earl “Jeepers Creepers” Clark
15. Austin “Ol’ Shatterbones” Daye
16. James “Joseph” Johnson
17. Jrue “Halitosis” Holiday
18. Ty “Clam Chowder” Lawson
19. Jeff “Fa” Teague
20. Eric “Mustard” Maynor
21. Darrin “Rick” Collison
22. Victor “The Beekeeper” Claver
23. Omri “Omribus” Casspi
24. BJ “Logs” Mullens
25. Rodrigue “Crayfish” Beaubois
26. Taj “Worst in the First” Gibson
27. DeMarre “Of the Marre” Carroll
28. “Squire” Wayne Ellington
29. Toney “Martin” Douglas
30. “Sister” Christian Eyenga
31. Jeff “Teddy” Pendergraph
32. Jermaine “Bespoke” Taylor
33. “Diamond” Dante Cunningham
34. Sergio “Cool” Llull
35. DaJuan “The Juan” Summers
36. Sam “Meat Lovers” Young
37. “Deadleg” DeJuan Blair
38. Jon Brockman aka “Bron Jockman”
39. Jonas “Bookshelves” Jerebko
40. Derrick “Murphy” Brown
41. Jodie “Fats” Meeks
42. Patrick “The” Beverly
43. Marcus “The Clawhammer” Thornton
44. Chase “Whoops!” Budinger
45. Nick Calathes aka “Nicky Lisp”
46. “Gorgeous” Danny Green
47. Henk “Cheese Biscuit” Norel
48. Taylor “Robin Lopez” Griffin
49. Sergey “The Noble Homo” Gladyr
50. Goran “Dark Chief” Suton
51. “Detective” Jack McClinton
52. AJ Price aka “General Cornballer III”
53. Nando De Colo aka “8 ½”
54. Robert “Bobby” Vaden
55. “Peppermint” Patty Mills
56. Ahmad “Paying Nividends” Nivins
57. Emir “The Smear” Preldzic
58. Lester Hudson aka “Jenny from the Block”
59. Chinemelu “Cranberry” Elonu
60. Robert Dozier aka “Twitchy”


George said...

BJ "Logs" Mullens - was that a blumpkin reference?

Both Teams Played Hard said...

AJ Price's makes sense. His game should lead to him being very well-known in Mexico.

Toasterhands said...

Bron Jockman is my favorite.

"The Smear" comes in 2nd.

MC Welk said...

Thou art the Noble Homo.

halfjaguarhalfjaguar said...

Is Beardo a reference to Fisto from He-Man? Unsettling

Alejandro said...

Nice list, but I went to IU and it's Robert "Darth" Vaden.

KneeJerkNBA said...

Terrence 'Turnpike Barbie' Williams, perhaps?

Props for 'Sister' Christian, btw. PURE WIN.

Sjaak said...

Taj "Mahal" Gibson?

Walt said...

Tyreke (Shooter) Evans
Tyreke (Drive By) Evans
Tyreke (Aiding and Abetting) Evans
Kings announcer: "... and Evans drives the getaway car, um, lane."

Walt said...

Big Trojans fan and I have to say, it should be Demar "DeBust" DeRozan, or "Debunked" DeRozan. He can also be referred to as "Package Deal" since he only went to USC after Tim Floyd gave Lil Romeo a basketball scholarship.
P.S. Taj Gibson can be referred to as Old Man Gibson, Methuselah Gibson, I'm Old Enough to Run for Congress Gibson.

Jameyb said...

Walt: I don't get the Tyreke crime references? Are you referring to when he walked into an abandoned house? Clown.

Patrick said...

Ol' Shatterbones is my favorite. Austin Daye is going to be such a chump in this league.