April 1, 2009

What Happened Was

I was in Canada (the country) for three days, and just returned to a totally different NBA. And it's not just the NBA that changed, it's everything about America. Maybe I'm just seeing things in a different light, now that I've experienced a completely different culture, but things aren't making sense.

When I left, so many moons ago, cloning was illegal. Now, it appears that if you have enough money you can pay someone to make your identical double to give you back rubs and laugh at your jokes even if they aren't funny.

And that's not the only genetic modifications that are now allowed. Always ahead of the curve, the Spurs have somehow found a way to make their players 15% larger than they usually are. The advantages of this are numerous. Not only are scoring, rebounding, and defending far easier, kneeing people in the genitals is almost commonplace after the size increase procedure.

I'm not terribly surprised because Obama. He's changing things (mostly basketball-related genetics, obviously). But it was a little weird to me that David Stern decided to change the rules of basketball when they've been the same for so long. That he's no allowing Greco Roman wrestling during games is off-putting. That it occurs between a Spaniard and a Frenchman is all the more jarring.

And to top things off, the Kings retired my Dad's number. I mean, I've always enjoyed playing with him; he's a great passer and suprisingly nimble, but I'm not sure why an NBA team is retiring his jersey when he's never played in the NBA.

Canada is so much different than America, and I spent so much time deeply embedded in their culture that it's been such a hard adjustment coming back. In time, I hope to understand this fascinating new league.