January 21, 2009

Tim Duncan Has Something To Show You


Hello.

I am Tim.

Oh, you noticed those banners? I must apologize. I did not mean for them to be so prominently displayed.

But since you mentioned it, yes, I did help win those banners.

I suppose you are correct, it is impressive to have so many championship banners in a single space. Thank you for your kind words.

(eyes bulge)

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY THINK THAT'S A FOUL?! I WAS JUST STANDING HERE WITH MY ARMS UP!!!

(raises arms above head, jaw drops)

SEE! I'M STILL DOING THIS!! THIS IS NOT A FOUL!! I AM TIM DUNCAN!! THIS IS NOT A FOULING TIM DUNCAN!!!

(returns arms to side and regains composure)

I am beyond sorry that you had to witness that heinous act. I cannot believe that a referee would assume that I, Tim Duncan, would commit such a foul. Nonetheless, thank you for noticing my titles.

Tim Duncan.

Titles.

Tim Duncan.

Tim Duncan.

(robot noises)

TITLEBOT 21 READY TO PERFORM MISSION. BANK SHOT CALCULATING.

(jab steps 100 times, whirling noises)

BANK SHOT CALCULATED. BANK SHOT ENGAGED. RELEASE.

(shoots precision bank shot, beeping noises)

Tim Duncan.

Titles.

(robot noises)

Titles Duncan.

(robot noises)

Tim Titles.

Tim Duncan.

(robot noises)

Hello.

I am Tim.

Oh, you noticed those banners? I must apologize. I did not mean for them to be so prominently displayed.

4 comments: