November 17, 2008

Shaq Want Eat Ref

Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh. What do I do? He's coming. He is so going to eat me. Think. Think quickly. Okay, in Jurassic Park, they stayed totally still. I'll try that. Did he notice me? I think he did.

What if I hold my breath? That'll help. That's got to help. Oh Lord, please let it help. I don't want it to end this way.

He's getting closer. I can't hold my breath much longer. Maybe a hand over the mouth will help. It's not helping. I'm going to explode. C'mon. Just a few seconds longer and he won't know I'm here. Fingers up the nose. It's my last chance.

He's going to swallow me whole. At least that'll be quick and painless. Well, quick at least. Tell my family I love them.

Wait. I'm still here. What happened?

Oh, Steve Nash, you're the best!

1 comment:

Kage said...

"Is he...is he still there?", asked the tasty NBA referee, too afraid to look..."He is", replied fellow white person Steve Nash, "just keep your arms crossed, any sudden movements will only upset him". Meanwhile Terry Porter attempts to appease the beast with the promise of a delicious NBA Ref after the match. "RUMM RAMM RUMM!!!! SHAQ HUNGRY NOW!!!!"