April 14, 2008

The Weakest Link: Los Angeles Lakers

Someone, possibly Aristotle, once said, “A chain is only as strong as its weakest link.” I don’t really get what that means, but as the playoffs approach, El Blowtorch will be profiling the worst player on each team’s roster. Then, the players will face off in a simulated one-on-one game of NBA 2K8 if it’s available at Video Villa. Obviously, this will provide the in-depth analysis needed to predict the winners for each playoff series. Up next, the Los Angeles Lakers and DJ Mbenga…

Were he still a Warrior and the Warriors were to make the playoffs, it’s highly likely that DJ Mbenga would be their Weakest Link as well. But that’s all hypothetical, like trash talk. Right now, we’re talking about verifiable terribleness; smack talk if you will.

DJ Mbenga is a large man from the Congo. Unlike fellow countryman Dikembe Mutombo, Mbenga is not very good at basketball. However, as mentioned before, he is a large man. Ergo, DJ has chosen the career path of such luminaries as Boniface N’Dong and Pape Sow – be huge, play basketball, make money. Not a terrible job if you can get it. Seems to have worked out fine for Michael Olowokandi.

Fun Facts:
Has a black belt in judo…favorite American food is beet salad…once walked 120 miles to obtain limited edition Bapestas from a San Francisco boutique…is a well-respected Haiku writer in his native Congo…favorite basketball player is Michael Cooper

Proof That DJ Mbenga Has Played an NBA Game for the Lakers:

2 comments:

rakibuzzaman said...

You could at least get his name right, no?

goathair said...

Wow. Thanks.