Today in Shaquille O'neal's Lunacy

Quoth Shaq: (Note: if this Twitter feed isn't really Shaq (likely), then this stands for the people behind it.)

Now, look at Erick Dampier:

Now, look at the definition of "goatee" from Dictionary.com:

Ergo, Erick Dampier is bearded. Ergo, Shaq (or his Twitterers) are stupid. You do not mess with the sanctity of the NBA beard. Not on my watch.

Furthermore, Erick Dampier is certainly not the best comparison for Andrew Bogut. Here are two better reference points:

a) Kelly Dwyer (he loves this comparison)

b) a less hairy Jim James

Please, be careful when discussing NBA beards. It's a touch subject for me.

Brought to you by the Society for Basketball Facial Hair of America.