Carlos and Michael Go On a Yacht

Mike Krzyzewski: Carlos, 'tis an honor that you would grace me with your prescence upon my yacht, the USS Krzyzewski.

Carlos Boozer: Certainly, my dear friend. Your yacht is a wonder among wonders. 'Tis my greatest pleasure to join you for the nautical adventure. Or should I say...yachtical adventure?

Krzyzewski and Boozer share a hearty laugh

MK: Carlos, Carlos, Carlos. You never cease to tickle my funny bone with your gentle pun-based humor.

CB: Only the education of the finest university in all the land could produce humor like this, dear Michael. To Duke University!

MK: Carlos, wait! We haven't any aperitifs! Jonathan, please bring me and my dear friend Carlos a Tom Collins.

JJ Redick: Yes, sir. Right away sir. Can I get you anything else?

MK: JUST GET ME THE TOM COLLINS! IT'S NOT THAT HARD IS IT?! YOU GET THAT COLLINS HERE FAST OR YOU GET THE STICK!

Krzyzewski turns back to Boozer

Sorry about that, Carlos. Good help is SO hard to find these days.

CB: You sir, are preaching to the choir. The clean-up after the Prince fiasco took eons. Not a soul knew how to properly frame my Caravaggio. The truest of travesties, Michael. Say, where is Jonathan?

MK: JONATHAN, WHAT IN THE NAME OF MIKE KRZYZEWSKI IS TAKING SO LONG?! I NEED MY DRINK NOW OR YOU'RE GOING IN THE HOLE AGAIN!

JR: Sorry, sir. It's just that we're out of lemons, so I had to substitute Real Lemon. The equivalents aren't quite exact and I know how you like your Collins.

MK: YOU MUST BE JOKING RIGHT NOW! YOU KNEW CARLOS WAS COMING ON THE YACHT! HOW DO YOU NOT HAVE LEMONS?!

JR: Sir, we've been sailing from Beijing to New York. I haven't had a chance to buy lemons.

MK: SO YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT THERE'S NOT A SINGLE LEMON IN ALL OF CHINA?! 1.5 BILLION PEOPLE AND ZERO LEMONS?! DOWN TO THE HOLE! NOW!

Krzyzewski turns to Boozer

My lord, I don't know why I keep that boy around.

CB: Well, Michael, he is ... Redickated to you.

Krzyzewski and Boozer share a hearty laugh