The Strokes - First Impressions of Earth

After my stint as the music critic for Benedictine University's own Candor, I have become a well-respected member of the press. What else could explain the fact that I got the newest Strokes album, First Impressions of Earth, early?1 Needless to say, I was both ecstatic and surprised that I obtained this highly anticipated released three days prior to its scheduled release date. Though I have had the album for about 3 weeks due to leaks, I still was glad to have the actual casing and high quality versions of the songs. And my first impression (pun intended) is that this album will get horrific reviews from the alternative music press, such as Pitchfork. But I think that this is unneeded and a little unfair. Room On Fire was maligned for sounding too similar to Is This It and now that FIOE is such a departure from the typical Strokes sound I have a feeling that it will get blasted in reviews. Nonetheless, here is a track by track review of the new album:

1. "You Only Live Once" - a typically Strokesy song that sounds a lot like Blondie as my boo has mentioned. This is probably the most expected sounding song on the album, and would be a good choice for a single.
2. "Juicebox" - the first single with a bassline that totally rips off the Peter Gunn theme. Julian has called this an "ugly song," and I understand that. It seems to be one of those love it or hate it songs, and it appears there is about a 50/50 break. I think it sounds very similar to "Planet of Sound" by the Pixies and I like it.
3. "Heart In a Cage" - there is some serious wailing on this track. This is the first album that has a real lead guitarist distinction for Nick Valensi, and he performs throughout the songs.
   
4. "Razorblade" - my favorite song on the album even if it is a total Barry Manilow ripoff. Once again there is a big Valensi guitar solo, and it's once again it is really good.
5. "On the Other Side" - if you like the Julian Casablancas croon, you'll probably like this song. He goes nearly Johnny Cash low on the chorus, which is pretty cool.
6. "Vision of Division" - this sounds like a pretty typical song until the 1:50 mark where there is an almost System of A Downish solo break thing that comes pretty out of nowhere. This song, along with "Heart In a Cage" show the Strokes stretching their legs the most.
   
7. "Ask Me Anything" - the closest relative to this song off the top of my head is "Eleanor Rigby" by some band called the Beatles2. This is the first Strokes song that does not have any guitars or drums in it, and they are replaced by the always creepy Melotron (written and played by Nick Valensi). The chorus is "I've got nothing to say," and the rest of the lyrics pretty much attest to that.
8. "Electricityscape" - the intro riff on this song is the darkest one that I've ever heard from this band, but the chorus is typically light and hooky. I'm a little disappointed that the chorus' drums actually resort to the disco pattern that has been all over the radio for the past year, but I guess they work.
   
9. "Killing Lies" - Nikolai Fraiture helped write this song, which is a rare occurence to wrest a song away from the perfectionist Casablancas. On a whole, this sounds like a song Interpol would do if they weren't totally into gloominess.
   
10. "Fear of Sleep" - the answer is 24, and the question is how many times is the phrase "fear of sleep" uttered in this song. This is an old Lou Reed trick, and everyone knows how much these guys love VU so it's really not surprising to hear. Then again, a lot of the songs are about New York just like you know who.
11. "15 Minutes" - have you ever wondered what the Walkmen would sound like if they did an Irish drinking song with a lounge singer as the frontman? Me neither, but at least the song isn't terrible for the last 2 minutes. Definitely not as good as a fame-is-hard song as "Take, Take, Take" by the White Stripes.
    
12. "Ize of the World" - I forget how much I like this song every time I listen to it, but it sounds very Room On Firey. Also, this has a bunch of Julian yelling which is always pleasant and desirable. And for the first time on record, Fab doesn't sound entirely like a drum machine while he's playing. Real abrupt ending here, a la "She's So Heavy" by those Beatles guys.
    
13. "Evening Sun" - this is a very relaxed song, and that's about all I have to say about it. Oh yeah, it was cowritten by Fab, so there you go.
    
14. "Red Light" - the drum intro is ripped off from "Rock-n-Roll pt. 2," and that's not bad. Plus you get that weird guitar effect from "12:51" on not one, but two guitars. Very danceable song, so I like it.

This album is a big break from what is expected, and though I think that will result in some needlessly bad reviews it's nice to see them trying out a few new things. The musician in me really likes the complicated guitar parts and differing song structures. I think that most of the experiments are successful, and a couple of them fall flat on their face (I hope to never hear anything like "15 Minutes" again). It's pretty widely known that these guys are equally big fans of Pearl Jam and the Velvet Underground, but this is the first time that there is a very grungey influence to the music. It's shown throughout with the soft-loud songs and the wealth of solos. And though this is clearly not as strong as Is This It or Room On Fire it's still better than most of the music being released nowadays.

My score: 7.9
Predicted Pitchfork score: 6.2

1. Full disclosure: A small independent record store somehow got their copies early and stocked them. But I am a big deal. Trust me.
2. But not even close to nearly as good.
   

2005, the Year in Music

Trey's Top Ten of Two Thousand and Five, the Year of Our Lord:
10. the White Stripes - Get Behind Me Satan
9. Sufjan Stevens - Illinois
8. the New Pornographers - Twin Cinema
7. LCD Soundsystem - LCD Soundsystem
6. M.I.A. - Arular
5. Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
4. Architecture in Helsinki - In Case We Die
3. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
2. Kanye West - Late Registration
1. Wolf Parade - Apologies to the Queen Mary

High Honorable Mention: Devendra Banhart - Cripple Crow, Kaiser Cheifs - Employment, The Boy Least Likely To - The Best Party Ever, Antony and the Johnsons - I Am a Bird Now

Honorable Mention: Sleater-Kinney - The Woods, Hot Chip - Coming On Strong, the Decemberists - Picaresque, We Are Scientists - With Love and Squalor, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - Howl, Queens of the Stone Age - Lullabies to Paralyze, the Shout Out Louds - Howl Howl Gaff Gaff, Beck - Guero, Animal Collective - Feels

Could Have Been Betters: Bell Orchestre - Recording a Tape the Colour of Light, Franz Ferdinand - You Could Have It So Much Better

Five Favorite Songs:
5. Bloc Party - "This Modern Love"
4. the White Stripes - "My Doorbell"
3. Kanye West (ft. Paul Wall) - "Drive Slow"
2. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - "The Skin of My Yellow Country Teeth"
1. Wolf Parade - "I'll Believe in Anything"

Best Concert Moments:
-"Rebellion (Lies)" - Arcade Fire, at the Riviera
-"Wake Up" - Arcade Fire, at Lollapalooza
-"Where Is My Mind?" - Pixies, at Lollapalooza
-"Oh My God" - Kaiser Chiefs, at Lollapalooza
-Dancing Man in Turban at Depeche Mode, at AllState Arena
-"Romantic Rights"- Death From Above 1979, at Intonation Festival
-Black Kids Dancing on Stage with the Go! Team, at Intonation Festival

In Case You Were Wondering

I don't know how it happened, but it did.

Pirates are overrated.

They have most definitely jumped the proverbial shark. It may have occured when they started selling pirate shirts at Hot Topic, but I'm not positive. So with that being said, I'd like to let you in on a little information:

Werewolves are the new pirates.

You were probably thinking ninjas would be the new pirates, but they too will jump the shark if they already haven't. So think about it. Werewolves. Yeah, that works.

Operation Cut the Fat

Recently, me and Mr. Adam Hansen have been embarking upon one of our historic missions. As you likely have gathered, this mission is titled "Operation Cut the Fat." The premises are simple:

1. Getting rid of the things in your life that you don't need.

That's it. This includes things such as deleting pointless phone numbers, removing friends from Facebook, or in the case of Adam, retiring from the Benedictine party community (finally).

My mission has been centered on removing the various phone numbers of people who I know that I will likely never call again and also trimming down my Facebook friends and groups to include only the most important. The remaining friends on my Facebook are only my good friends at Benedictine and my friends from high school who I like to keep in touch with. Otherwise, you're outta there. It's not meant to be a malicious thing. It just makes my life simpler and easier.

The influences for the Cut the Fat movement (CTF) are far-reaching. They include, but are not limited to: Douglas Coupland's Generation X, the George Foreman Lean Mean Fat Reducing Grilling Machine, and of course, Adam's untimely drunken outbursts directed at certain stupid girls.

As I said, Mr. Hansen has retired from the Benedictine party community after a few unfortunate incidents and the pestering of his friends. This has been a major component of the CTF. Furthermore, in a move inspired by both Jerry Poro and Vin Diesel, Mr. H (as his students call him) has even quit the Facebook. Though this is a commendable action, it is not one that is necessary in the CTF. The Facebook is valuable as a way to keep in touch with old friends, and in my case, meet a wonderful lady. Nonetheless, the dedication shown by Mr. H is one that should be applauded.

When all is said and done, it is our sincere hope that CTF will enrich our lives. We encourage you to take a look at your life and get rid of what you just don't need.

Quick Story

I got paid a bizarrely awesome compliment tonight. Normally, my boo specializes in these, but this one came from a highly unlikely source.

Earlier this evening my sister told me she had to tell me what Chelsey said about me. Chelsey is my sister's classmate and friend from way back, like age 3. She is also Tyler's (the Feedback Whales guitarist and my oldest friend) sister. Needless to say, due to our age differences her and I have no communication whatsoever. This is what made the compliment bizarre. ANYWAY, Sis began by telling me that Chelsey was shocked that I was on Myspace, which seems weird because just about everyone is on Myspace. She then proceeded to tell me that her and Tyler were talking about how I knew about "every band" and how it was "so cool that I could know so much about so much music." If you know me, you know that I take a small amount of pride in my musical knowledge, and that I constantly search for interesting things. So to know that the guitarist from my band and his sister marvel at my abilities is kind of neat. I don't know how they could have possibly began this conversation, but the fact that I know it took place is fun for me.

This was one of the high points of my day, along with a call for a job interview. Also, hearing my girlfriend sound happy and excited on the phone was definitely a pick-me-up. Made me want to be with her tomorrow even more than I already did.

I'll Be Your Mirror

I'm really confused about what I look like to other people. It is quite common to try to compare people you know to famous people. Adam, for example, is widely believed to be very Will Ferrel-esque. But I seem to be unclassifiable. As proof I present to you the strange array of people I have been compared to.

Justin Timberlake - this is the most common comparison that I get. In high school, I once signed a Justin Timberlake autograph while at the mall.









Ryan Reynolds - this originally was a Grandma only opinion, but lately people at work have been saying it too. At first I thought it was due to my beard, but even after I shaved one guy was afraid I would kill him with an axe just like Mr. Reynolds in The Amityville Horror.








This is where things start to get weird.

Brett Favre - I wish I could play football like Brett Favre (and I bet he wishes he could too), but I really see no similarity except for blue eyes. I think another mitigating factor would be that he has roughly 15 years on me. I don't get it.









Steven Seagal - this is surely a Grandma only opinion, right? I can't see anyway that me and the most lethal man to ever have a ponytail look alike. It should be noted that my grandma is not blind and/or senile.









After seeing these pictures, you can see why I am confused about who I look like to other people. So please, let me know who you think I look like so that I can begin the casting for my biopic.

Quickly

Here is a quick list of albums that I really liked this year that could make my official top 10 list of 2005:

• Apologies to the Queen Mary - Wolf Parade
• Silent Alarm - Bloc Party
• LCD Soundsystem - LCD Soundsystem
• Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
• Illinois - Sufjan Stevens
• Late Registration - Kanye West
• In Case We Die - Architecture in Helsinki
• The Best Party Ever - The Boy Least Likely To
• Cripple Crow - Devendra Banhart
• Employment - Kaiser Chiefs
• Arular - M.I.A.
• Twin Cinema - the New Pornographers
• Howl Howl Gaff Gaff - the Shout Out Louds
• The Woods - Sleater-Kinney

As you can probably figure out, that is more than 10 albums1. But I think those are my favorite releases of 20052. Some of these I am surprised were released in 20053, but that helps make the list even better. I shall finish said list by the end of the month.

1. 14 to be exact.
2. A few notable exceptions to this preliminary cut: Lullabies to Paralyze - Queens of the Stone Age, Guero - Beck, Howl - Black Rebel Motorcycle Club. All 3 are highly recommended, but not quite as strong througout as the above mentioned.
3. Those are: Bloc Party, LCD Soundsystem, M.I.A., and Kaiser Chiefs. It seems like those have been out forever.