July 14, 2005

Teefes

I know I run the risk of sounding like a bad Jerry Seinfeld, but what's the deal with dentistry? I just had my 6 month check-up and going there never ceases to weird me out. The first thing that's a little off for me is the fact that when the hygeniest or dentist is all up in your grill they don't even look at you. Its not normal for a person to be that close to your face without either a) kissing you, b) talking to you, or c) looking you in the eye. But just when you think the weirdness is over, they actually talk to you. What are you supposed to do in that situation? If you speak you run the risk of incurring injuries due to the various metal hooks presently in your mouth; but if you don't speak you're ignoring a person who is 3 inches from your face and in control of those hooks. This is why I usually go for a grunt or throat laugh, depending on the situation. Another awkward time is when something funny happens. You obviously can't smile for fear of being admonished for not saying "ahhhh." Then again, you don't want to be No Sense of Humor Guy. It's just unfortunate all around. But the thing that is most confusing to me is that you see the actual dentist for all of 3 minutes. He shakes your hand, pokes you teeth, moves the mirror around and then he's out of there. Kind of like drive-by dentistry. But oh well, I don't have any cavities so I don't really need the dentist to be there that long. Because truthfully, I've had enough confusion for one trip. See you in six months.

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